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Maybe you just stopped believing in the kind of naive love that you can only trust when you're young. Embrace your new reality For every 20-something entering the gay dating scene full of wide-eyed wonder, there's a 50-something (or a 60-, 70- or older-something) man back on the market after a relationship ends. Your next romantic partner will benefit from all of that, and from your passions for the life that's in front of you. Give up trying to be perfect, too, especially if that's a code word for "young." Yes, it's important to take care of your body and your health, but no need to obsess.But what about the deeper, more mature love that allows for the wide spectrum of experience and truth? One is learning the rules; the other has "been there, dated that" and wonders, "Now what? Instead of trying to be 25 again, get comfortable in your skin. That way, when someone touches you, they'll really feel you, and not a bundle of self-critical tension.Think more about keeping a sparkle in your eyes and less on fighting the fine lines around them. Pick your meet 'n' greet venues wisely Does walking into a gay bar make you feel more out of place than Lady Gaga shopping for clothes at a mall?Yes, it's true that the Olympic-sized pool of dating prospects you swam in years ago seems like a lap lane when you reach your 50s. Get off of the sideline and get involved in your passions and interests.Bette Davis used to say, "Getting older ain't for sissies." Amen!Neither is dating at midlife — especially if you're a gay man. But don't let that be your excuse for sitting home on Saturday night watching reruns of The Golden Girls.For example, if you like the outdoors, join a gay hiking or walking group, and meet men while you get fresh air and exercise.Focus on smaller parties, events centered on hobbies and interests, and volunteer opportunities.
Check out sites such as that can help you find long-term relationships versus flings or hookups.
You recognize dysfunction and mismatches faster now than you did when you were younger.
But that doesn't mean you should be rigid and inflexible. Chat with a guy who isn't your "type" and stretch your boundaries.
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