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Whereas people having online affairs tend to understate their problematic nature, their offline partners typically do not see difference between online and offline affairs: A lack of direct physical contact and face-to-face meetings does not diminish the sense of a violation of their vow of exclusivity.

The fact that most of these affairs are concealed from offline spouses is indicative of the possible harm.

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Online sexual activity can involve various activities, such as viewing explicitly sexual materials, participating in an exchange of ideas about sex, exchanging sexual messages, and online interactions with at least one other person with the intention of becoming sexually aroused.

In his stimulating paper, "Chatting Is Not Cheating," John Portmann defends online lust and characterizes about sex; he maintains that such talking is more similar to flirting than to having a sexual affair.

But they may be so when participants are also involved in another primary offline relationship, because of the harm imposed on those partners.

Time spent in that world can help them their actual world, while not giving up on having exciting, even emotional experiences.

Living within the two worlds is not easy, however, and may become increasingly risky when people do not realize the limitations of each.

Many of them believe cybersex to be similar to pornography—an extension of fantasy that actually helps to keep them from physical affairs with other people.

Consider the following statement from a 41-year-old married man (all citations are from to cheat—something that may even add spice to their offline relationship.

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